BLHO Chapter 85

Chapter 85: You’re Awake

Chapter 85: You’re Awake

Past memories flashed through his mind, and Lin Shuangxu, like an observer, hurriedly reviewed his brief life.

He hadn’t forgotten his father’s last words before his death:

“Don’t be attached, don’t strive. May your life be peaceful and smooth. Being mediocre is enough.”

However, entrusting him to the He family, who held immense power, did his father truly want him to be mediocre for life?

Lin Shuangxu slowly opened his eyes. The familiar bed curtains told him he was still in the border garrison camp.

He wasn’t injured, but every part of his body ached. Each breath felt like a dull knife scraping across his lungs, hurting so much that he couldn’t control his tears.

The scalding liquid slid down the corners of his eyes, silently soaking the pillow that was already wet several times over.

He stared numbly at the top of the bed, his face expressionless, his body unmoving.

The door was pushed open, and a gust of cool wind blew in. He heard approaching footsteps but didn’t react at all.

The person who came to see him reached the bedside and saw that his eyes were open. He was momentarily unsure, stunned for a moment before hurriedly putting down the bowl of medicine. He leaned over to the bedside, overjoyed, and said, “You’re awake.”

It was Han Mao’s voice.

“You…” Han Mao was a little at a loss, wanting him to sit up and drink the medicine, but afraid he wouldn’t have the strength. He wanted to talk to him but was afraid of disturbing him. He hesitated for a long time before carefully asking, “Do you feel better?”

Lin Shuangxu’s tear stains had dried on his temples, and his tired eyes didn’t even blink. Han Mao couldn’t even feel if he was breathing. He leaned in a little closer and tentatively called out, “Shuangxu?”

His eyelashes trembled slightly, and Han Mao was relieved. Then, he picked up the bowl of medicine, carefully blew on a spoonful of the broth to cool it down, and fed it to Lin Shuangxu’s mouth. “The military doctor said this medicine should be taken while it’s hot.”

Lin Shuangxu didn’t seem to hear him.

Han Mao held the spoon, not daring to force-feed him. He pondered saying a few comforting words, but at this moment, Lin Shuangxu finally spoke.

“Where are those people?” he said, staring at the top of the bed, indifferently.

Han Mao didn’t react for a moment. “Who?”

Lin Shuangxu’s parched lips moved as he said, “The people he rescued.”

Han Mao put the spoon back into the bowl and replied, “They’re all recuperating in the camp.”

“I’ll go see them.”

Lin Shuangxu supported himself on the bed, struggling to get up. Han Mao quickly stepped forward to help him, but when he unintentionally glanced over, he obediently withdrew his hand, reminding him, “Be careful.”

Lin Shuangxu dragged his weak body out of bed. Han Mao couldn’t help but feel that it was inappropriate and tried to dissuade him, “I’ve already arranged for people to take care of the injured. It’s not too late for you to go see them when you feel better.”

Lin Shuangxu didn’t listen to him and walked straight out. Han Mao had no choice but to grab a cloak and follow him out.

The two walked through the corridor and came to the room where the injured were being housed.

Dozens of beds were filled with people. Some were in stable condition and were sleeping soundly, while others had severe festering wounds and groaned in pain, making it unbearable to watch.

Lin Shuangxu slowed his pace and walked past each bed, carefully examining each injured person.

Without exception, everyone had their tongues cut out. When he approached, they stared at him with cautious eyes, seeming to want to say something to him, but only produced incoherent sounds when they opened their mouths.

Besides having their tongues cut out, these people’s limbs were also bandaged with white cloth, their hands and feet limp on the bed, seemingly unable to move.

Lin Shuangxu frowned slightly, silently confirming each person’s injuries.

He was walking forward when he suddenly heard Han Mao say, “Be careful!”

While reminding him, Han Mao reached out to pull him, but it was too late. Lin Shuangxu only felt a bump on his waist, followed by a heat on his arm. Something spilled on him and then clattered to the ground.

Han Mao helped him stand steady. “Are you alright?”

Lin Shuangxu then saw that it was a little girl carrying a full tray of medicinal soup who had fallen and accidentally bumped into him.

The bitter smell permeated the air, and the medicine spilled all over the ground. The little girl’s watery eyes widened in panic and turned red. Helpless, she squatted down to clean up the mess on the ground.

“Why are you so careless?” Han Mao gently scolded the little girl. She couldn’t speak and couldn’t defend herself, so she could only wipe away her tears in fear.

“Let me see.” Han Mao took Lin Shuangxu’s wrist and turned up his wet sleeve. The skin was a little red from the scalding.

He lowered his head and blew on the reddened area, but Lin Shuangxu seemed to feel nothing at all, staring straight at the little girl in front of him.

“Don’t you remember?” Han Mao said to him, “She was the one who stopped us on the road to ask for help that day.”

Of course, Lin Shuangxu remembered.

He withdrew his arm and squatted down to help the little girl clean up. The little girl kept her head down and still didn’t dare to look at him.

Lin Shuangxu picked up the broken pieces of porcelain and placed them on her tray, his movements very slow. With a clang, the little girl was so frightened that she dropped the tray and repeatedly kowtowed on the ground, moaning and weeping, not knowing what she was saying. Lin Shuangxu looked at her calmly, unmoved.

Han Mao stepped forward to defuse the situation, saying to the little girl, “Alright, it’s okay. You can go now.”

The little girl hugged the tray and ran away.

Han Mao said to Lin Shuangxu with concern, “The air here is heavy with unclean energy. Your body hasn’t recovered yet. Go back to your room and rest.”

Lin Shuangxu watched the little girl’s back until she disappeared completely before turning his gaze back and nodding to Han Mao.

Everyone seemed to have agreed that after Lin Shuangxu woke up, they would tacitly avoid mentioning He Yuncheng’s name.

They were afraid of making Lin Shuangxu sad, and Lin Shuangxu himself was the same. It was as if as long as they didn’t mention or ask, the matter could be treated as if it had never happened.

He took his medicine on time every day, ate his meals on time, and whether it was Han Mao or the people of the He family army who came to take care of him, he cooperated without any collapse or resistance.

His calmness was what worried people instead.

Han Mao didn’t dare to leave him for even half a step, fearing that he would quietly take his own life. During the day, he stayed by his bedside, and at night, he stayed outside, leaning against his door, sleeping lightly in his clothes.

As the days passed, Lin Shuangxu’s complexion gradually improved, but Han Mao had become visibly thinner.

Anyone with eyes could see that, nominally, Han Mao was taking care of He Yuncheng’s widow on his behalf, but in reality, his feelings for Lin Shuangxu were written all over his face long before He Yuncheng’s accident.

The He family’s people had anger but couldn’t express it. Firstly, Han Mao was only showing concern and hadn’t done anything out of line. Secondly, the young master was currently sad and haggard, so if someone could soothe his mind, wouldn’t that be a good thing?

As for the future, who the young master wanted to be close to and who he wanted to distance himself from was not something others could interfere with.

This night, it rained intermittently. Han Mao still didn’t return to his room, sleeping outside Lin Shuangxu’s door as usual.

His clothes were damp, and he wasn’t sleeping soundly anyway. After midnight, he suddenly heard a noise in the room. He immediately woke up, turned around, and pushed the door open to enter.

There were no candles lit in the room. Han Mao vaguely saw a figure standing beside the desk. He rushed over and saw that it was a teapot that had been knocked over on the ground.

Without bothering to clean up, he first checked if Lin Shuangxu was injured. “What happened?”

Lin Shuangxu allowed him to fuss over him and calmly explained, “I was thirsty and wanted to pour a glass of water.”

“Why didn’t you call me? I was right outside the door. Why did you get up yourself? Did you hurt yourself?”

Lin Shuangxu shook his head.

Han Mao found the fire starter and lit the candle stand. By the light, he realized that Lin Shuangxu had been looking at him the whole time.

His heart skipped a beat, and he subconsciously avoided Lin Shuangxu’s gaze.

Lin Shuangxu didn’t flinch or hide, speaking to him, “Why don’t you go back to your room and rest?”

Han Mao licked his lips, feeling somewhat embarrassed. “I’m worried about you.”

“What are you worried about?”

Han Mao didn’t speak.

Lin Shuangxu asked, “Are you worried that I’ll commit suicide for him?”

Han Mao took a deep breath and met his eyes. “The deceased is gone. General He’s spirit in heaven must also hope that you recover as soon as possible.”

He was the first person to mention He Yuncheng in front of Lin Shuangxu, feeling extremely nervous as he spoke.

Lin Shuangxu’s lips moved slightly. Already very close, he took another step towards Han Mao.

The frozen depths of his eyes were melted by the candlelight, and the sorrow that had been buried deep within overflowed.

That broken appearance was enough to move even a bodhisattva.

Han Mao was drawn to those dark eyes, waiting with pity for the tears inside to fall.

But the shimmering brightness suddenly faded, and Lin Shuangxu slightly raised the corners of his lips, revealing a smile that was more bitter than tears.

“Brother Han,” he said to Han Mao in a hoarse voice, “I want to drink alcohol.”

His current body shouldn’t be getting drunk, but Han Mao couldn’t refuse his request, answering almost without thinking.

“Alright.”